Clarisse and Joe
by Bremol
Summary: When things go all wrong for Clarisse and Joseph before the wedding, Mia learns a secret about their past. Set between the dance break-up scene and the wedding in PD2.
1. Chapter 1

Clarisse sat staring out the window of her suite. Her heart hurt, like someone had ripped it in two, and she knew why. She'd hurt Joseph earlier. She'd seen it in his eyes even though he'd tried to hide it from her. As tears continued to stain her cheeks, she wrapped her arms around herself and leaned her head against the glass. Cold…she felt so cold. How could she have repeated the same betrayal of his love as she had when they were young?

_Clarisse nudged her horse making it go faster. Her Joe was waiting for her in their special place. Her heart beat faster as she thought of Joe and his charming smile, his sparkling eyes, his tender embrace…his loving kiss. Her face burned as she thought of the last time they were together. They'd been so close to going too far, but they'd both pulled away, knowing that they couldn't do that no matter how much they wanted to._

_Finally reaching her destination, Clarisse smiled down at Joe as he stood by her horse with open arms. "Hello, my darling Joe," she breathed as she leaned into his arms and let him gently pull her from the saddle._

_"Hello, my darling." Joe whispered just before touching his lips to hers softly. "How long can you stay?" he asked, his hand gently combing through her wind tousled hair._

_"I'm free for the day. Father thinks that I'm with Mary out shopping in the city." She smiled up into the green eyes she adored._

_"What about your mother?"_

_Clarisse hung her head. "I'm so sorry, Joe. I know that we promised to keep us seeing each other a secret, but Mother is very astute and she guessed that I had fallen in love." She looked up at Joe with a soft smile. "She knows about us, Joe. She knows that I'm with you."_

_Joe sighed, "You love me?"_

_"I love you." Clarisse caressed his face. "You know that I do."_

_Joe kissed the hand that had caressed his face. "Yes, my darling…I know that you love me." Leading her over to a tree, he pulled her down with him and leaned back against the trunk, Clarisse resting against his chest. "I know that you love me when I see you smile at me or when I look into those beautiful blue eyes. I was just teasing because I love to hear you tell me you love me." He smiled when she looked up at him and playfully smacked his chest. _

_"You rat."_

_"A rat that loves you very much." He pulled her close. "What are we going to do with our time today?"_

_"Nothing but this. I just want to spend my time here in your arms."_

_"As you wish." _

Opening her eyes, Clarisse quickly wiped her tears and regained her control as another knock sounded on her door. "Yes…come in," she called. Looking toward the door, she pasted on a smile when she saw Mia enter. "Hello, Darling."

"Gran'ma." Mia frowned as she got a good look at her grandmother's puffy eyes and cheeks that were streaked from crying. Sitting next to her grandmother, she rested a hand on her knee. "Are you alright?"

Clarisse smiled at the girl she'd grown so close to over the last six years. "I'm fine, Darling. It's nothing for you to worry about."

Mia frowned. "Gran'ma…you've been crying. You don't cry. Queens don't cry, especially over nothing."

"Oh Mia." Clarisse sniffed and pulled the girl into her arms. "There is something, but it is something that I have to deal with on my own. I made a mistake, one that hurt someone, and one that I'm not sure I can fix." Her voice cracked as she held Mia a little tighter.

Mia wrapped her arms just a little tighter around Clarisse. She'd never heard her grandmother's voice crack before, and it was breaking her heart. Wishing that her grandmother would talk to her and let her help, but knowing that she wouldn't, Mia offered the only comfort she could. "Can I stay with you for a little while? Maybe you could tell me more about my father and uncle Pierre when they were boys."

Clarisse caressed Mia's hair and kissed the top of her head. "I would love for you to stay with me, but shouldn't you be spending time with Lilly?"

"But Gran'ma…" Mia pulled away and looked at her.

"I'm going to be alright, Darling. You needn't worry about me. Go spend time with Lilly."

Mia frowned knowing that she'd lost. "Alright." She hugged Clarisse one last time before quietly leaving.

Clarisse watched Mia leave. She was so lucky to have such a beautiful, tender hearted granddaughter. Deciding that she needed a cup of tea, she got up and wrapped her robe tightly around her before heading for the kitchen. Maybe a nice hot cup of her favorite tea would help her calm enough so she could sleep.

"Probably not," she muttered as she entered the kitchen and set about fixing her tea…glad that she was alone.

C-J

Joe stared down into his still full cup of coffee. How had things gone so wrong? He'd thought she loved him. They'd spent so many nights together talking and just holding each other as they had done when they were young, that he had thought they had recaptured what had been lost.

Evidently he was wrong.

No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't stop his heart from hurting. She'd chosen her duty to Genovia over him…again. Couldn't she understand that she could be the guide and teacher that Mia needed and still have a relationship with him? Why couldn't she see that he would never do anything to keep her from helping Mia learn what she needed? He loved Mia too, she was his girl, just as Clarisse had always been. Didn't Clarisse know that he would never hurt Mia by being selfish?

_Joe watched as Clarisse twisted her hair to wring some of the water out of the long locks. He couldn't believe she'd let him talk her into swimming with him in the river. He smiled at the way her slip clung to her body and dreamed of the day that body would be his to explore and love. _

_"__Joe…what are you staring at?" Clarisse looked at him with a raised eyebrow knowing exactly what he was staring at._

_Joe grinned. "You know exactly what I'm staring at." _

_Moving to where Joe sat watching her, Clarisse knelt down beside him. "I'm so glad I could provide the entertainment."_

_"__Lady Clarisse." Joe raised an eyebrow at her then laughed. "What would the nobles think?"_

_"__Damn the nobles." Clarisse frowned. If only she hadn't been born the daughter of a nobleman._

_Joe laughed. "You really hate being a part of that body of society, don't you?"_

_"__Yes, Joe, I do." She snuggled next to him as they sat in the sun to dry off. "If it weren't for my position in society, I could see you freely. We could be together in public and I wouldn't have to lie to my father."_

_"__I'm sorry, Clarisse."_

_Clarisse heard something in Joe's voice and she leaned up to look at him. "Joe, I'm not ashamed of you. If it were up to me, we would be together publicly, but it isn't up to me. If my father found out that I was seeing the son of the palace gardener, I would never be allowed out of the house. He would most likely send me away to study abroad." She touched his cheek. "I would never see you again, Joe." A tear ran down her cheek. "I couldn't bear that."_

_Joe wiped the tear from her cheek. "I couldn't bear it either. I rush through my daily chores so that I can get ready to meet you here. You're always on my mind." He kissed her softly. "Marry me, Clarisse. Run away with me to somewhere where it doesn't matter that we're from different parts of society."_

_"__Oh Joe." Clarisse sighed._

_"__I understand. Will you just promise to marry me? Wear this as a token of my love and our promise?" Joe slipped the ring from his pinky. _

_"__Wasn't this your mother's?" Clarisse asked as she held her hand out and accepted the ring._

_"__Yes." Joe smiled. "You remembered."_

_"__Of course I remembered. I remember everything you've ever told me." She looked at the ring encircling her finger. "I can't keep it here," she whispered._

_"__I know. Just keep it with you. Wear it when we're together."_

_"__I promise."_

Disgusted with his cold coffee, Joe spit the drink he'd just took back into the cup and decided a trip to the kitchen to pour it out was in order. Maybe a nice walk afterward would help him clear his head so that he could sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

After arriving in the kitchen, Clarisse had decided that she needed to eat something and drink a warm glass of milk instead of tea. Sipping carefully at the steaming liquid in her cup, the soothing she had expected didn't come. Frowning she sat the cup down, preparing to sit as well when she heard footsteps behind her. Turning, she froze. "Joseph."

"Your Majesty." Joe's voice was cold.

Clarisse felt her eyes well up at the coldness she heard in his voice. "I…" she stammered.

"I'm sorry to disturb you, Your Majesty. I was just coming to pour out my coffee." Joe moved to the sink, never making eye contact with Clarisse. Pouring out the cold, nasty liquid, he turned and bowed. "I'll be leaving now."

"Joseph, please…" Clarisse pleaded. "I'm so sorry for earlier."

"What's done is done, Your Majesty. Goodnight." He bowed again and left.

"What have I done?" Clarisse covered her mouth to stop her sob from echoing through the palace halls. Sitting down, she rested her face in her hands. "What have I done?" she whispered again.

C-J

Joe patted the nose of Clarisse's horse. "How can I stay? How can I continue in my position here when seeing her does nothing but hurt?" It was then that Joe made up his mind. After Mia's wedding, he was leaving. He would turn in his official resignation tomorrow. "Goodnight, old friend." He patted the horse's nose once more then turned and walked out into the cool night air.

_"Joe, please. I have to get home." Clarisse struggled half heartedly to get away from his embrace. "Father will be fuming that I'm out past dark."_

_Joe reluctantly released her. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have kept you out so late. I'll ride most of the way with you. It's not safe for you to be out alone on the roads."_

_"We have to be careful, Joe. If someone sees you with me…" Clarisse situated herself in her saddle. "It's light enough with the full moon that I'll be alright."_

_"I'll keep back once we get on the main roads." Joe promised as he mounted his horse._

_Clarisse smiled at Joe as he moved up beside her and they nudged their horses into a moderate pace. "I like this," she called._

_"I like it too. I just wish you were going home with me…going home to my bed." His green eyes sparked at the thought._

_"Joe." Clarisse felt her face warm._

_Joe smiled at the blush that crept into her face. "Don't say you haven't thought about us together."_

_Clarisse looked down at her hands. "I won't deny it." Hearing horses in the distance, she immediately looked up. "Joe, you have to go. I'll be fine from here."_

_"But you're still so far from your home." Joe didn't like this._

_"Joe, you can't be seen with me."_

_"I'll go off into the trees. Once they've passed and are a safe distance away, I'll join you again."_

_"Alright, Joe." Clarisse agreed…it was useless to argue._

Joe frowned as he heard horses riding off toward the lake. Who would be out this late at night? He rolled his eyes. "_You_ are out this late at night." He shook his head in the hopes of clearing the fog of the past. Maybe he hadn't heard horses after all. Maybe it was just his memories.

C-J

Clarisse sat, an open book on the table in front of her, staring into her half empty plate. She couldn't seem to focus on anything. Resting her chin on her fist, she let her tears fall once more as she thought of the pain in Joe's green eyes. His voice and manner had been cold, but he couldn't hide the pain in his eyes. If she closed her eyes, she could see the look he'd given her when he realized she'd chose duty over love…it was the same look he'd had all those years ago. "You're a fool, Clarisse. A lonely old fool," she whispered to herself.

Wiping her tears, she decided that she needed to get control of herself before she was caught by one of the staff. Sniffing one last time and rubbing a napkin over her cheeks, Clarisse sighed in relief that she'd calmed when she heard footsteps. Hearing Mia's maids utter her name and start to back away, she turned with a smile. The two of them were about as bad as Mia…a perfect fit to her clumsy and sometimes flighty granddaughter.

C-J

Joe groaned…so he had heard horses last night. When was Mia going to stop making foolish decisions? The closet meeting was one thing…this was another. He knew Clarisse would be livid when she saw this. There just might not be a wedding tomorrow after all.

_Joe stared at his father. "What?"_

_"You heard me, Son. The king has granted my request. You are to be part of the palace security for Prince Rupert." _

_Joe raised his eyebrows. "I can't believe it. I…" he shook his head. How had his father known that was what he wanted to do?_

_"You're my son, Joseph. I've watched you watching them and I know that you spend time with Charles. He told me that you are a quick study."_

_"Thank you, Father." Joe smiled and jumped anxiously. "When do I start?"_

_"As soon as Prince Rupert marries. In two weeks."_

_Joe's eyes widened. "Two weeks? I had no idea they'd found a suitable young woman."_

_"I've heard rumors."_

_"Ah." Joe nodded. "May I go now, Father? All of my work is done for the day." He had to get to his and Clarisse's meeting place._

_"Yes, go…but don't stay out so late tonight." His father scolded._

_"Yes, Father." Joe rushed toward the stables. He couldn't wait to tell Clarisse about his new job. Now he would be able to save the money they would need to start a new life in a new country._

C-J

Clarisse paced the floor of her suite. Mia was out apologizing to Andrew…she only hoped that it worked. When was Mia going to grow up and stop making such foolish decisions? Hadn't they just had a huge argument over the closet and the fountain incidents? She rubbed her temples. She had developed a splitting headache from the lack of sleep, the crying, and then the scolding she'd just given Mia. Sighing, she gave up her pacing and sat down by the window to stare out at the grounds once more. No matter what was happening, she couldn't keep her thoughts from turning back to Joseph.

_Clarisse felt her heart fall to the floor. How could her father do this to her? How could he sell her like this? "How can you do this, Father? You've sold me to the highest bidder." _

_"You will watch your tongue when speaking of the prince, Clarisse." Her father ground out. "I haven't sold you. No money changed hands."_

_"But, Father, what is the difference? No money may have changed hands, but you **have** sold me. Your position has become more powerful with this arrangement." She shrugged her shoulders as her tears continued to fall. What was she going to tell Joe?_

_"In two weeks you will marry Prince Rupert…that is the end of this discussion."_

_Clarisse stared at the man that was her father. At this moment, she hated him. She would never forgive him for doing this to her. Looking at her mother, she begged with her eyes, but got nothing. Feeling the walls closing in on her, she ran from the room. Her Joe was waiting for her at their secret place. She needed his strength…she needed his love._

Wiping her tears, Clarisse felt her heart breaking at the thought that she was basically no better than her father had been. She was pushing Mia into this marriage, a marriage of duty…a marriage devoid of love. She knew that Mia didn't love Andrew, and from watching Andrew, she knew that he didn't love Mia as anything other than a friend.

"What have I become?"


	3. Chapter 3

Clarisse stared at the letter in her hand…Joseph's resignation in which he states that he has decided to retire. "Oh Joseph," she sighed. She couldn't bear the thought of his leaving, but she didn't know what to do. He'd shut himself off when it came to her, and no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't get passed the wall that was now between them. She'd ruined a wonderful relationship…again. "When are you going to learn, Clarisse?" she grumbled at herself as she sat the letter down. "I'll learn when I'm lying on my deathbed…alone."

"Gran'ma?" Mia whispered as she poked her head inside her grandmother's suite.

"Oh, Mia. I'm sorry, Darling. I didn't hear you. Come on in."

"I'm sorry, Gran'ma." Mia noted that her grandmother's cheeks were once again streaked with tears and her eyes were puffy. "You've been crying again."

Clarisse wiped her cheeks. "I'm fine now, Darling. How did things go with Andrew?"

"He understood. The wedding is still on." Mia wished her grandmother weren't so stubborn. She had heard some of the palace staff talking and she was pretty sure she knew what had her grandmother upset. If only she knew why Joe and her grandmother had had a falling out of sorts. What could have possibly gotten between them? Joe loved her grandmother, she knew that…everyone knew that. She also knew that her grandmother loved Joe. They had been so close to one another with a relationship of something more than just friendship.

"Oh no," she breathed. She finally figured out what it was that had come between them. "It was me."

Clarisse frowned at her granddaughter. "What are you talking about, Darling? What was you?"

"The reason you're crying. It's my fault." Mia threw herself into her grandmother's arms. "I'm so sorry. So very sorry."

Clarisse watched helplessly as Mia pulled away and ran from the room before she could respond. "What is going on?" she wondered as she turned her attention back to the letter from Joseph. Thinking about Mia and the wedding, Clarisse decided that she would travel after Mia officially became Queen. Maybe traveling would help her get her mind off of Joseph and what she had lost.

C-J

Joe watched Clarisse as she walked the gardens. How could he leave her? How could he stay? So many questions, and only one answer…he couldn't. He couldn't leave her…but he couldn't stay. What was a man to do? Could he possibly talk to her and make her see that he only needed to be by her side as her husband, confidant…lover? That he didn't want her to neglect her duty to Mia and her country. Why couldn't she understand that things were different now? People wouldn't care if they were together as they would have when they were young.

_"You'll never believe this, Darling." Joe rushed Clarisse excitedly as she stopped her horse next to where his was tied to a branch. Helping her down, he pulled her into his arms. "Father got me a new job. I'm going to be part of Prince Rupert's security detail." He felt her stiffen. "Clarisse…Darling…what is it?"_

_"Oh Joe," she whispered with a shaky voice. "I have to tell you something. Things have changed for us." Clarisse's tear filled blue eyes stared up at him._

_Joe swallowed hard…a sick feeling stirring in the pit of his stomach. "What do you mean?"_

_"Father…he…" Clarisse pulled away. "Joe…in two weeks I'm getting married…to Prince Rupert."_

_Joe stumbled back against the tree. "What?" Sliding down to the ground, he let his head fall back. "So Father's rumors weren't rumors."_

_"I'm so sorry, Joe. I never dreamed Father would do something like this." Clarisse knelt down beside him and caressed his cheek._

_Putting his hand on hers, Joe looked at Clarisse. "Let's leave tonight, Clarisse. I have enough money saved that we can get far enough away from here to get married safely and then I can easily find a job."_

_Clarisse pulled her hand away and rested it in her lap with the other. Staring at her hands, she felt like she was going to be sick. "I can't, Joe."_

_"Clarisse…we made plans. You promised to come away with me…you promised to marry me."_

_With tears blinding her vision, Clarisse pulled Joe's ring from her finger. "I'm sorry, Joe. I have to do this. I have a duty to my country," she whispered as she placed the ring in his hand._

_Joe felt himself die inside. His love was turning her back on him and their dreams. "I'll be leaving now," he told her quietly as he got up and quickly mounted and rode off._

Joe closed his eyes against the memories. He'd heard her cry out that day. It was something that he'd held inside all these years. He'd been so hurt that he'd never let himself think of it. His father had known that something was wrong, but hadn't asked, and he hadn't offered an explanation.

Again, he turned his attention to Clarisse. She was now standing under one of the pear trees. From the way she was standing it seemed that she was staring off into space. _What is she thinking about?_ Joe wondered as he carefully moved closer. Even if he was leaving, he was still her head of security and it was still his duty to protect her.

C-J

_"Oh god." Clarisse cried, her body shaking as the pain of what she'd just done rocked through her. "Oh Joe. I'm so sorry! I'm sorry!" she cried out as she rocked back and forth, her arms wrapped tightly around herself as she tried to ward off the cold that suddenly washed over her._

Clarisse closed her eyes, the feelings of that long ago afternoon so strong it was as if she were there once again. She could feel the same sick feeling in her stomach as she had then. She knew she was being watched, and knew that it was Joseph. All she wanted to do was run to him and beg him to give her a chance to make the right decision…but she couldn't do that. Sighing, she walked toward the stone bench under the tree and sat down, Maurice's head resting in her lap in comfort.

_Bowing before the King and Queen, Clarisse was glad for the gloves covering her hands. She'd fought clammy hands all day and hadn't found a way to stop it. Her mother had tried to assure her that it would be alright, but nothing could soothe the aching in her soul for Joe and what she'd done to him. She knew he was there. He was now one of the team that guarded Prince Rupert…that soon would guard her._

_"My daughter, Clarisse, Your Majesties." Her father spoke as she finally stood and looked up. "We give her to your son, Prince Rupert, with our blessing. May God grant them a fruitful marriage."_

_Clarisse felt her stomach turn. How was she going to do this? How was she going to marry a man she'd only met once when they were children, knowing that her Joe was there watching them? Taking a deep breath, she let herself be led out of the throne room by several maids. This was it…they were taking her to be readied for her wedding to Prince Rupert. Turning once before she left the room, she caught sight of Joe. He was watching her, hurt in his eyes, a cold look on his face. She'd lost him by her decision. She'd lost her dreams of a life filled with love and happiness…she'd lost the only thing that had ever truly mattered in her life…_

_She'd lost her heart._

"Oh Maurice," she whispered as she patted the dog's head. "I guess it's just you and I after tomorrow."

"Gran'ma!" Mia called as she made her way out to where Clarisse sat.

"Mia, Darling. Is everything alright?" Clarisse shook off the sadness.

Mia frowned. When was the last time she'd found her grandmother happy? Every time she'd seen her in the last several days she'd been crying. "Gran'ma…I know that you are upset, and I know that it has something to do with Joe. What happened, Gran'ma? I've been hearing murmurs, but I want to know the truth. You're so sad, Gran'ma. I want to help."

Clarisse cupped Mia's cheek in her hand. "Oh my darling girl. Yes, it does have something to do with Joseph, but it's very private. I've heard the murmurings, also. Pay no attention."

"Gran'ma…you have to let me help you. I can't stand to see you this way."

"I'll be fine, my darling. You have final preparations for your wedding to see to. The last thing you need to be worrying about is your old grandmother. Besides, I have some final business I need to take care of to get things ready for you to become Queen."

"Gran'ma…you and Joe…you knew each other when you were young…didn't you…"

Clarisse looked away trying to fight the tears that welled up in her eyes. "Yes, Mia, we did. Joseph was with your grandfather for a lot of years."

"I don't mean that, Gran'ma. You knew him before you were married."

Patting Mia's hand, Clarisse smiled at the young woman. "Darling, that's all in the past. Those days are gone now and not to be worried about. Go on, now. I believe you have a final fitting you're late for." Seeing Mia's hesitation, she patted her hand again. "I promise, Darling, some day I'll tell you the story, but not right now."

"Alright, Gran'ma." Mia kissed Clarisse's cheek and rushed off.

Clarisse shook her head. If only Mia knew, would she hate her as she hated herself?


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Thank you all so much for the follows, favorites, and reviews!

* * *

Mia frowned. "Uh, Gran'ma?"

"What is it, Darling?"

"This dress…it…" Mia looked down at the wedding dress she was wearing. She didn't want to hurt anyone's feelings…but…it was awful…and it wasn't hers.

Clarisse looked up from the papers she'd been going over. "Oh my!" she exclaimed as she looked at the dress Mia wore.

"This isn't my dress, Gran'ma." Mia felt the panic begin to set in.

"Don't panic, Darling." Clarisse could see it in Mia's eyes, and the last thing she wanted or needed was for her granddaughter to go crazy with panic. "I'm sure it was just a simple mix up and that your gown is just fine."

Mia sighed…what a mess this all was. An arranged marriage, a man she liked…but just as a friend…and a man she was in love with…but who was trying to steal her crown. If only she could go back to college…at least life had been as simple as she could have it since finding out she was a princess. "Gran'ma?"

"Yes, Darling?"

"What was it like?" Mia gladly let the dressmaker's assistant help her out of the dress.

"What was what like, Darling?"

"Marrying Gran'pa."

"Oh." Clarisse's voice was sad.

Mia groaned. "There it is again. Please, Gran'ma…you have to tell me what is making you so sad."

Clarisse sighed. The girl was right. Besides that…she wouldn't leave her alone if she didn't. "I'll tell you, Darling, but not here. Let Madame find the right dress. After you try it on to make sure everything is right, we'll go back to my suite and I will tell you the story."

C-J

_Joe felt sick to his stomach when he heard Clarisse's father introduce her to the King and Queen. The thoughts of his Clarisse with another man…but there was nothing he could do…she was no longer his Clarisse. She hadn't been since the day she'd told him she wouldn't run away with him. He swallowed passed the lump forming in his throat as he caught her gaze. He knew she was searching for the hurt, and he knew that she'd found it, but he would remain cold and indifferent. He had to…it was the only way he would survive._

Joe shook himself to clear his head and rolled his eyes when Lionel shouted again. "Lionel, I can hear you."

"Yes, Sir." The young man stopped in front of Joe.

"What is it you wanted?"

"Where do you want me?"

"You're supposed to be watching the Viscount's nephew, Lord Nicholas."

"Yes, Sir."

Joe drug his hand over his face in exasperation as he watched the young man rush away. This was one thing he wasn't going to miss. He was a man of great patience, but Lionel was sorely trying that patience. How could one young man be so…so…stupid?

_Joe couldn't believe how stupid he'd been. How could he have missed the man hiding in the bushes waiting to attack? Prince Rupert was now recovering from the attack, thankfully, but it made Joe question his ability to fully do his job. Could he guard the man that was now married to Clarisse, without letting his feelings get in the way? No matter how hard he tried, she was still in his thoughts day and night…every hour of the day. He watched her with Rupert, and heard their laughter. How could she be so happy? How could she live with herself for hurting him as she had?_

_Over time, those thoughts turned into bitterness, and Joe climbed the ranks to become the head of the security team. He was finally able to do his job without being distracted with thoughts of her by the time the first son had been born, and by the time the second son had been born…Joe's heart was completely buried behind a stone wall._

"A wall she's broke through." Joe mumbled. Why had he let her in again? How could he have forgotten the pain and rejection he'd felt? How could he have let her make him forget the years he'd spent getting over her and forcing her from his mind? Why had he thought she would choose differently this time? "How could I have been so stupid?"

C-J

Mia sat with a stunned expression on her face. Clarisse had just finished telling her the story of how she and Joe had known each other and the love that they had shared and lost by her arranged marriage. "Oh Gran'ma. How did you ever develop your fondness for Gran'pa? How were the two of you such good friends?"

"He didn't know, Mia. He wasn't behind the arrangement. Rupert, although he never told me, was also in love when we were forced into the marriage. He realized as our marriage went on, that I was in love with someone, but he never knew who it was, and he never asked." Clarisse's voice was quiet as she watched Mia's face. "I'm so sorry, Darling. I'm no better than my father was."

Mia frowned. "Gran'ma, you aren't gaining anything from this marriage…so far…you're losing."

Clarisse blinked as she looked at her granddaughter. "You mean…you're not upset with me?"

"Why would I be?" Mia didn't understand her grandmother sometimes.

"Oh Mia." Clarisse pulled the girl into her arms and held her tightly. "I was so worried that you would be mad at me for doing to you what my father did to me."

"Gran'ma." Mia said in exasperation. "You aren't doing anything to me. You told me that I didn't have to do this. You aren't forcing me, I chose this. Your father forced you into that marriage because he wanted the power and position he'd been offered. He sold you." She frowned…what kind of man had her great grandfather been?

"He wasn't always like that, Mia." Clarisse read the girls thoughts. "When I was a little girl, my father was wonderful, but power and the hunger for money changed him. Mother hated the man he became, and left him a year after I married Rupert. I never saw her again."

"I'm sorry, Gran'ma."

"It's alright, Darling. I understood. I didn't want to see Father, but because of who I was married to, and because of Father's new position…I saw him at parties and other occasions. Rupert wasn't the most observant man when it came to things other than running his country, so he never noticed how cold I was to Father."

"Was your father still alive when Gran'pa became King?"

"Yes, but he died about a year later."

"Gran'ma…why did Joe stay?" Mia looked into her grandmother's sad eyes as she waited for her answer.

"I don't know, Mia. Sometimes I think that he would have been better off, and been much happier, if he would have left and gone away. He might even have had a wife and family of his own, if he had."

Mia shook her head. "No, I don't think so. He loves you, Gran'ma…and it's a deep love."

"How do you know that?"

"It's in his eyes, Gran'ma. I see it every time he looks at you or when he says your name. Why do you think he so easily became my babysitter back in San Francisco?" Mia giggled.

"He loves you, Mia. He's never said so, but he does. You're the closest thing he's ever had to a child of his own."

"I like that." Mia smiled. "I love Joe, and I love you. I hate what my mess has done to the two of you. Because of me…" she let her sentence hang.

"No, Mia. It isn't your fault. The fault is all mine. I chose my duty to the country over Joseph, again, and this time I fear that I'll never have another chance." Clarisse's voice cracked and she looked away.

"Oh Gran'ma. Don't say that. He has to give you a second chance."

"Mia, I've already had a second chance."


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: This chapter has bits added to it that weren't in the original story. I've changed things to add another chapter and more to the end as was requested in another posting.

* * *

Charlotte watched Clarisse as she silently stared out her windows. She knew that she was upset about Joe's leaving, but she didn't know how to help. Today was Mia's wedding. Why wasn't anyone happy? Mia wasn't happy, the Queen wasn't happy, Joe wasn't happy, and none of the staff were happy. It seemed that the Queen's unhappiness had infected the entire palace. A tear rolled down her cheek as she thought of why the Queen was unhappy. She'd heard the entire conversation that day. She hadn't meant to, but it had been hard not to.

Why couldn't the Queen see that she could help Mia and love Joe too? It didn't make sense, nor did the deep pain she could see in both the Queen and Joe's eyes. There was more to this than just that day. She knew that Joe was leaving, but that wouldn't cause the deep pain that haunted the Queen's every move. She also knew that the Queen and Joe were in love, but was it really that deep? She frowned. What was going on?

"Your Majesty." Charlotte finally spoke up.

"Yes, Charlotte." Clarisse whispered, never taking her eyes off of what she was looking at out the window.

"The guests will be arriving in an hour."

"Thank you."

"Yes, Your Majesty. I'll go and make sure things are running smoothly with the final preparations." Charlotte backed out of the room and sighed. This was going to be a long day.

Clarisse didn't notice Charlotte leaving, but she did see Mia sprinting across the gardens. "Now what is that girl up to?"

C-J

Mia had spotted Joe out her window and knew that she had to try and talk him into letting Clarisse have another chance. "Joe!" she shouted when he started to walk away.

Joe turned and frowned when he saw Mia running toward him. "Princess, what are you doing?"

"I have to talk to you, Joe." Mia panted out as she stopped in front of Joe.

"You could have sent one of your maids," he scolded.

"Don't scold me. I didn't want Gran'ma to accidentally hear what I have to say."

"Princess."

"Don't _Princess_ me." Mia frowned. "You have to give her a chance. She loves you, Joe. And it's my fault that she said what she did. Don't give up on her. Please. Just give her a chance to talk to you before you leave."

Moving closer to the young woman in front of him, Joe tenderly cupped her cheek. "Mia, it isn't your fault. I know that you love your grandmother, but there's nothing more to be said. She made her choice." Feeling his heart ache at the tear that rolled down Mia's cheek, he tenderly wiped it away. "I'm not leaving you, but I have to get away for a while. You have my number, and you know that if you need me, I'll come. I love you as if you were my own, Mia."

"Oh Joe." Mia wrapped her arms around him. "She told me that you did."

Holding her tight, wondering when he'd grown so soft, Joe ran his hand over Mia's hair. "You remind me of her, you know. You remind me of her when we were young."

Mia looked up into Joe's sad eyes. "I do?"

Joe nodded. "Yes. I think that was one of the reasons it was so easy for me to watch you when we first came to San Francisco."

Mia smiled. "Joey," she whispered.

"No. Joe." Joe countered, also remembering that moment in the limo.

Blinking back tears, Mia begged again. "Please, for me, give her a chance."

Once again wiping her tears, Joe gave in. "Alright."

Smiling, Mia hugged Joe. "Thank you."

"Now go or you're going to be late…and make me late too." Joe laughed as Mia grinned then took off running. Shaking his head, he made his way slowly back through the gardens toward the palace. He had to hurry so that he would be ready before the Queen. The last thing he wanted was to be late for his last day as security.

C-J

"Just because I didn't get my fairytale ending doesn't mean you shouldn't." Mia spoke quietly into Clarisse's ear, smiling when her grandmother looked up at her with a startled expression.

Clarisse stared at her granddaughter across the crowded space of the church. Did she really expect her to talk to Joseph now with all of these people present? Her heart hammering in her chest, she looked to Charlotte. "Did you hear that?" she asked.

"Not if you didn't want me to." Charlotte answered causing Clarisse to half chuckle.

"Oh Charlotte." Clearing her throat and running her hands down her dress then straightening her jacket, she called for Joe. "Joseph."

Joe raised an eyebrow. What could she possibly want? Moving to stand before her, he bowed his head slightly. "Your Majesty?" he queried as he bowed his head.

"Dear Joseph," she sighed. "Am I too late to ask you to accept my hand in marriage?"

Joe blinked in surprise and cleared his throat. That was not exactly what he'd been expecting. "Clarisse?" he whispered.

Lowering her voice, she stared into the green eyes that had haunted many a dream down through the years. "I'm giving you the answer I should have given you all those years ago. I don't care what all of those people think anymore. All I care about is you. Is it too late?"

Studying her a moment, he found what he was looking for then reached up and pulled his ear piece out of his ear and dropped it and the rest of the setup in his hat. Turning, he handed the hat and its contents to Shades. "It's all yours now. Good luck with Lionel. I'm going to a wedding."

Clarisse smiled when Joe turned back to her and held out his arm. "Thank you," she whispered.

Joe nodded and chuckled a bit when Mia's bouquet was handed to Clarisse. This was pure and utter madness, but he was getting what his heart had longed for…madness be damned. Wasn't love madness in and of itself?

Clarisse was nervous as she and Joe walked down the aisle. What would the people say? Would they react badly? Would they demand that she end this before it ever began? Looking around her, she noticed the smiles and happiness and felt her nervousness disappear. The people, her people, were happy for her.

"Careful, Darling." Joe whispered from her side as they climbed the stairs. He knew she was always graceful ascending stairs, but this time she'd been so distracted he felt the need to warn her.

Squeezing his hand, she nodded as they effortlessly made their way up to stand before the Archbishop. Standing before the man who obviously knew that there had always been more between the queen and her head of security, Clarisse's mind couldn't help but go back in time to her first wedding. She'd been scared and near tears through the whole affair because she hadn't loved the man she was standing pledging her life to…because the man she did love was standing nearby watching the whole thing take place.

Joe watched the emotions flitting across Clarisse's face as they both responded automatically to the Archbishop's words, neither having their full attention on the ceremony. He knew where her mind was, the same place as his. That wedding day had nearly been his undoing. He'd wanted to rant and rage at the world, at her parents, and the Prince himself. He still remembered how badly his hands had suffered. He'd hit the brick wall of his father's home so many times that night as the thoughts of his Clarisse sharing a bed and intimacy with another man flooded his mind with relentless repetition, that he'd been amazed when all he had were badly scraped and cut knuckles with nothing broken but his heart. His father hadn't realized until that night that the woman his son had been in love with was the very woman that had been given to their future king.

"You may kiss the bride," the Archbishop whispered bringing them both out of their thoughts back to the present.

Their hearts in their throats, their hands clasped, the couple leaned into a gentle kiss that spoke volumes in its simplicity. Mia's, "Woohoo!" broke through the spell and caused the couple to break apart.

Clarisse scanned the crowd again, amazed that they were clapping and some were cheering with Mia. They were truly happy for her. All these years alone, all these years that she'd been afraid of what her people would think if she brought her relationship with her head of security out into the open. Had her people known? Had they always been ready and willing to accept she and Joe together?

Joe tugged at her hand and led her carefully down the steps. "Come, Wife," he whispered, a broad smile on his face. "We have a party to attend."


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: I forgot to say thank you the last time, so I'm saying an extra thank you to all of you who have favorited this story, followed me as an author, and given me such wonderful reviews. Thank you very much! Now, onto other things. This chapter pushes the T rating to its limits. I've added a love scene where there wasn't one in the original version of the story. It was requested by a friend, and because C/J are fighting her wish for a happy ending in my WIP, I gave in and this is the result.

* * *

Clarisse felt her heart beat faster as she looked into Joe's eyes. He smiled and pulled her closer. "Oh Joseph," she whispered.

"You can call me Joe now, my darling." He gently caressed her back.

Clarisse smiled. "It's been a long time."

"Yes, it has, but there is no reason to be that formal anymore."

"I can't believe it."

Joe smiled and kissed the hand that he held as they continued to sway with the soft music that filled the ballroom. "I can't believe it either." He pulled her a little closer. "I'm so glad that I let Mia talk me into giving you another chance."

Clarisse blinked up at him. "Mia?" she questioned then remembered that she had seen Mia darting out toward the gardens. "So that's where she was going this morning." She smiled.

"What?" Joe was confused.

"I saw Mia running out to the gardens this morning."

"Oh." Now he knew what she was talking about. "She came to beg me to give you another chance. I almost didn't listen to her…but she reminds me so much of you and when she started crying…" Joe shook his head. "I was immediately taken back to the times that I had seen you crying and that did me in. I knew that I had to promise her what she wanted because I couldn't stand seeing her cry."

Clarisse smiled. "She's watching us."

"I know. She's very proud of herself, I think."

"Are you sorry?"

"Sorry?" Joe looked at Clarisse with a raised eyebrow. "Sorry that I am holding the woman I love in my arms? Sorry that I'm wearing a gold band on my finger symbolizing that I belong to that same woman? Sorry that I can now kiss you anytime I want…and not have to worry if anyone has seen us?" He shook his head. "Not in the slightest. I'm happier than I have been in a very long time."

"So am I." Clarisse laid her head on Joe's shoulder as they fell into a companionable silence and continued to drift around the dance floor.

Mia watched her grandmother and Joe and wiped a tear. She hadn't gotten her happily ever after, although, she wasn't sure that marrying a man she didn't love would have been a happily ever after. She had found a man to love, but it was going to take a while to get the country used to the fact that she was now in love with the man that had tried to steal the crown. Oh well, she needed time anyway. She had to get used to running a country.

Looking at the way Joe held her grandmother, Mia felt happy. It was as it should have been. This was the true love story, a story that had finally gotten its happy ending. As she watched the newlyweds, she wondered just how many people in the room knew about their past. She knew that some of the staff had been there for a long time, but she wasn't sure if any of them had been there long enough to know about their Queen and Joe when they were young. It was something to ponder and find out about later.

C-J

Clarisse couldn't believe the way the day had turned out. A wedding…but not Mia's. She looked down at her ring…a smile brightening her face. She had loved Joe for so many years, and now, thanks to her beautiful granddaughter…that love was able to live in the open.

"Kiss for your thoughts." Joe offered as he pulled her into his arms, placing a tender kiss on her soft neck.

Clarisse smiled. "I was just thinking about today, and how things turned out." She turned in his arms and smiled up at him. "I love you."

Joe smiled. "I love you too, Clarisse." His lips touched hers in a soft kiss. "You're my wife."

"Yes, I am." Clarisse smiled. "Finally."

"Do you know how I ached when you chose duty over love?" his voice was quiet.

Clarisse caressed his face. "Yes…I know…because I ached with you." Snuggling back into his arms, she rested her head on his shoulder. "I loved you so much, Joseph…Joe…so much. I used to lie awake nights and cry because of the choice I had made. Rupert knew that I was in love with someone, although I don't think he ever realized it was you."

Joe looked at her in awe. "You really cried over me?"

"Yes. I loved you and I was stuck with a man that I didn't really know…didn't love."

Joe looked away. "But a man you slept with…had children with."

Cupping his face in her hands, Clarisse made him look at her. "Joe…I had to. I didn't want to. I wanted to be with you. I wanted you to be the one I gave myself to. That wasn't something I could do…but I can give myself to you now." Looking into his wonderful eyes, she tenderly caressed his face. "Know this, my husband. Tonight, when we make love…I will be giving myself to you, wholly and completely…and freely."

Joe closed his eyes. "He didn't…"

"Shh," she shushed him with a finger on his lips. "No. He didn't. Rupert was very kind to me. We grew fond of each other as the years went by and he became my best friend." Clarisse closed her eyes. "In the beginning, I was never really with him…not mentally or emotionally anyway. And I wasn't with him out of anything other than duty. When we were together, in that way, I think that he thought of the woman he was in love with, imagining that it was she that he was touching and holding. I always thought of you and how I longed for him to be you…for it to be you touching me and sharing my bed. After the boys were born…" She shrugged. "We shared separate rooms, and he only occasionally came to me. I think it was to keep up appearances. You know how the palace staff talks."

Joe rolled his eyes. "Yes, I do." He sighed and pulled her close. "Oh, Clarisse. I'm so sorry. You must have been so lonely…but I'm glad that he was kind to you."

She frowned. "Why? If anyone should be sorry, it is I." Softly she touched her lips to his. "I am the one that let my duty overrule my heart and hurt you." She smiled at him. "Joe?"

"Yes?"

"Why did you stay?"

"Because…I loved you. I couldn't leave you, even if I couldn't have you…just being close was enough. I finally managed to put up a wall and stopped thinking of you all the time." Joe caressed her face. "I'm glad that I let you break that wall down."

"Is it enough now?" She gazed into his eyes.

"No," he answered honestly as he caressed her cheek. "Because it no longer has to be. You're mine now."

A soft smile caressed her lips. "Yes…yes, I am." Moving closer, Clarisse dropped her voice. "Make all of me yours."

Joe's hands deftly lifted the straps of the gown she was wearing and let it slip to the floor. He stepped back and sighed, "Beautiful." Pulling her into his arms, his lips were tender as they told her of his love in the sweetest of kisses. "I'll never take."

"I know."

"I'll always give."

"And so will I."

"I want you."

"Then take me." Clarisse whispered. "It's been so long, Joe. I don't really know how to…"

"Shh." This time it was his turn to silence her. "I've waited for so many years to have you in my arms…to be the one making love to you. It's alright…it's alright," he whispered.

Clarisse shivered as his hands caressed over her body, pausing at her waist and the only garment she still wore. Biting her lip, she closed her eyes as his hands slowly pushed the blue satin down. Hearing his intake of breath, she opened her eyes to find his green eyes burning with desire as he took all of her in.

"More than I ever dreamed," he murmured.

"Younger than your dream," she mumbled in response.

Shaking his head, Joe cupped her face. "No. The woman in my dreams aged with the woman in my life. The dreams I have are of you. It's you as you are now that I've spent my nights with."

A tear rolled down her cheek at his words. "Sweet man."

Wiping at the errant tear, he smiled at her. "Not sweet. Just a man in love and wishing desperately to make love to the woman who holds his heart."

Smiling brilliantly, she reached out and caressed his bare chest. She loved that he'd come to her in nothing but pajama bottoms of black satin. Feeling the muscles ripple and respond to her touch, she made sure to touch each inch of the hard plane that she had rested against so many times over the years when he was protecting her, holding her in her grief, holding her in their youth as they fought against their passions running away with them. Sliding her hands lower over his ribs to his waist, she looked up at him. Holding his gaze, she pushed at the waistband of his pants, the satin pooling at his feet. Letting her gaze roam from his over his body, she swallowed down the rush of desire that flooded her at the sight of him. He was all man, every inch of him. And dear god how she lusted after him.

Seeing the look in her eyes, Joe took her hands. "Come to bed and we can both fulfill our desires."

Letting him lead her, she kept her eyes on his, frowning when he stopped at the bed. "What is it?"

"Did you spend nights here with him?" he questioned quietly.

Shaking her head, she stepped closer to him, pressing her body against his and shivering at the feel of him hard and ready against her stomach. "No. Even the nights he came to me, I insisted we go to his room so that I could come back here and be by myself. He always fell asleep after and I didn't want him spending the night in my bed." She snarled. "He snored and hogged the blankets."

Joe laughed, breaking the tension. "I snore, but I promise I'm not a blanket hog."

Grinning at him, her blue eyes filled with love, mirth, and want, she caressed his cheek. "The snoring I can deal with."

Turning the covers back even more, Joe moved onto the bed and held out his hand to her. "We'll go slow," he assured her when he saw the look of doubt that crossed her face.

Taking his hand, she knelt on the bed in front of him, her free hand resting on his chest. "I don't know how to make love," she whispered. "I was never much of a participant in the act." She shrugged. "It was sex for the sake of gaining heirs to the throne."

Gently maneuvering her around and settling her back against the pillows, Joe laid down beside her, his hand caressing her soft skin as he smiled down at her. "Then let me make love to you. It will be my pleasure to teach you the difference between sex and making love."

Biting her lip, she shivered when his hand moved up her thigh over her ribcage, cupping her breast. "Oh," she moaned when his thumb swirled around the nipple causing it to tighten in response. Closing her eyes when his head lowered, she bit her lip at the feel of his warm breath blowing against the sensitive tip before gently taking it in his mouth and suckling. Her toes curled and her breath quickened. Lifting her hands, she held his head to her when he kissed a path to the other breast and repeated the action.

Moving his mouth from her breasts, Joe kissed his way across her skin to her mouth. Pressing tender, light kisses to each corner, he softly covered her mouth with his. Slowly and with a purpose, he drew her into the kiss before deepening it, his tongue pressing for entrance. He smiled slightly when he felt her responding, remembering their bygone kisses as her tongue moved against his, her hand cradling his head. Moving his hand over her hip, he trailed it lower and lower until his finger was tracing around the wet swollen flesh of her center.

Feeling his finger slip between her wet folds, gently thrusting in and out, Clarisse arched her back and gasped as her fingers dug into his shoulders. "Joseph!" she cried out.

"That's it," he gently coaxed as he inserted another finger. "Just let it happen, Clarisse. I promised to give, not take…let me give this to you. Just follow your body's responses."

Taking a deep breath, she concentrated on his voice then turned her attention to her body, listening to the thrumming in her veins, the pounding in her ears. Letting all of the sensations guide her, she rose high with the swell of desire then crashed as her orgasm burned through her, ripping a cry from her chest.

Settling himself in the cradle of her parted thighs, Joe softly nuzzled her neck as he waited for her to calm. Nibbling her ear, he felt her hands come up to caress his back. Moving his mouth to hers, he kissed her lightly before leaning back slightly so that he could look down at her. "That was beautiful," he whispered.

"That was," she sighed. "Amazing. I've never felt that way before."

Caressing the damp hair from her face, Joe tenderly traced her cheek with his thumb. "You'll feel this way every night as long as you ask it of me." Moving his hips against her, he smiled when her breath caught in her chest. "I know it's been a long time, I'll go slow and easy."

Biting her lip, she nodded and squeezed his hands when he entwined their fingers. Inhaling a sharp breath at the feel of the first inch of him stretching her, she held tighter to his hands and closed her eyes to concentrate on her breathing. In and out, a sharp intake of breath here and there, until she felt him completely filling her. "Oh god," she moaned.

Pulling out, Joe gently pushed forward again, this time a little faster. Waiting patiently for her to adjust, he repeated the action, going faster each time, until she was whimpering his name, her body growing restless beneath his. "Lift your legs and wrap them around me," he whispered against her ear.

Opening her eyes, she stared up at him, doing as told and moaning at the change in angles when he thrust forward and ground against her. "Oh," she murmured in surprise. "Oh."

Watching her face, the look of bliss softening her features, spurred Joe on as he continued to thrust in and out of her, grinding against her with each forward motion. He knew at this angle he was hitting her g-spot, and he knew she would be feeling like she was going mad as the release built to a fevered pitch…exactly how he wanted her.

Eyes going wide, Clarisse stared up at her husband. "Joe?" she queried just before her mind shut down, her body taking over completely.

Letting go of his control, Joe moved wildly against her as he buried his face in her neck, his release coming on him hard and fast at the feel of her body arching up into his, her inner muscles clenching around him.

Laying limply, legs and arms sprawled on the bed, Clarisse took as deep a breath as she could with Joe's weight still pressing her into the mattress. Feeling him shift to her side, she smiled when his head continued to rest on her shoulder. Tilting her head down, she pressed a kiss to his bald pate, sighing in pure contentment. "Mmm," she hummed. "So this is what it feels like?"

Joe smiled and pressed a kiss to her damp skin. "Yes, Love. This is what it feels like." Rolling onto his back, he pulled her against him, his hand caressing her bare shoulder. "This is how it will always be between us."

"Mmm," she hummed her approval. "I think I'm a very lucky woman."

Shaking his head, he lifted her face up. "No. I'm the lucky one."

"No, Joe. I'm the lucky one because you gave me another chance even after I'd hurt you a second time by choosing duty over my love for you."

"Shh," he pressed a finger to her lips. "None of that matters now. What matters now is that you're my wife and we get to spend the rest of our lives together."

"I like the sound of that."

He smiled. "I love the thought of it."


End file.
